One of the largest challenges I’ve faced throughout my life is a lack of confidence. My low self-esteem has held me back, made me feel unworthy of success and fearful of failure, and I’m willing to bet you’ve felt the same. There are times in all of our lives were we feel vulnerable, lesser and undeserving but it’s time to climb out of the self-confidence pit and face the world! It may seem like a paradox, after all how can we gain the confidence to build our confidence? But with these simple steps at least you’ll be on the right path & helps to boost your confidence:
Taking control and responsibility for your self is the first step in most challenges we set ourselves.
An important task you may want to undergo is really figuring out who you are. Are there negative patterns in your life that you need to address? What are your principles and morals? What makes you feel empowered? What do you really enjoy doing? What do you want from life? With these questions in mind you can aim towards them with your growing self-confidence and live a better, more fulfilling life based on your own standards and expectations. It will take time but eventually you will find yourself owning your mistakes and celebrating your successes.
Additionally, by taking control you must also address negative influences outside of yourself. Ignore other peoples’ opinions and judgement, they mean nothing to you because you control how you see yourself. Trust your own instincts and surround yourself with love and real friendship goals.
The first step to taking control is to manage your thoughts. Banish the negative self-talk, thought processes and patterns, and instead replace them with positive, affirming beliefs. Positive affirmations do wonders for your self-esteem; so even though you may feel silly, simply try telling yourself something positive in the mirror each morning. Make deliberate actions to improve your self-image and you will start to accept they are true: you are intelligent, attractive, worthy of respect and confident.
Spend Quality Time with Yourself
To many people with low self-confidence being alone can seem like a nightmare, particularly romantically. Yet being alone (read: alone, not lonely) and enjoying your own company can be one life’s most self-esteem boosting, comforting activities. Do something you love that you wouldn’t necessarily do if other people were around. Watch that show you’re embarrassed to admit you love, anything that makes you happiness.
In the future these activities you love to do can become hobbies, leading to an overall more rounded and interesting existence.
Take Care of Yourself
A lot of confidence building occurs in your inner world, but it’s always nice to be presentable for the external world as well. If you look good then you feel good: it’s as easy as that! Wear your best dress or jeans, do your hair, have a shave; all those things that make you feel fresh and at your best.
Just make sure you watch out: this focus on how you look can also lead to the tricky habit of comparing yourself to others. Which is just about the worst thing you could possibly do and is something you should avoid at all costs!
Chances are you’ve heard about how smiling tricks your brain into releasing happy hormones. But, did you know any positive action has the ability to do the same? Simply by walking taller and more confidently for example, you allow more oxygen into your system and into your brain, increasing alertness.
Socially, interacting positively will encourage others to respond to you well. This is perhaps my biggest flaw, as I often mumble and become anxious in social situation, and then beat myself up when others don’t react well. It’s like a self-fulfilling prophecy! If you also struggle in social situations, just take small steps with each interaction. There is absolutely no need to be making huge, earth-shattering impressions on everyone when you first meet them, so progress at your own rate!
Set Small Goals and Achieve Them
Nobody wants to remain stagnant, but the only way to move forward’s is to face challenges, fears and probably even failures. When you are ready to start moving forward, set yourself small, achievable goals and be proud of yourself when you complete them. Perhaps you could work on changing a habit you don’t like, exercise more. Finish a task you’ve been putting off, call a friend or send an email to someone; anything at all just to start off and get the ball rolling.
Building confidence is an ongoing process that will not happen overnight, but at least by choosing a new path. There is the possibility of blossoming into an entirely new, confident you.